I’ll be honest, I hate difficult people. Life is pretty hard to begin with and I reserve the right to save my coping mechanisms for the more difficult times. I’m sure we’ve all been there – a situation where work would be pretty easy if not for that guy who constantly complains or the girl who yells at you everyday.
There are many different types of “difficult” people, but for the sake of this article I’ll define them as those who make an otherwise enjoyable workday absolutely miserable with their rancid personalities. The truth is ignoring it doesn’t really work but confrontation can also end badly.
Here are 10 tips for dealing with difficult people at work.
10. Be Cool
Being level-headed and rational will always have you winning at work, which is why you should always try to keep calm under stressful circumstances. Don’t keep your opinion to yourself, but always make sure that when you decide to talk, you are level-headed and not speaking from an emotional place. This will only aid in the destructive atmosphere. You don’t want to be a participant.
9. Don’t Feed the Beast
An easy way to hate your job is to be in an environment where everyone constantly complains about everything. It’s easy to join in on dishing about how little everyone gets paid or how much of a jerk your boss is, but don’t feed into the behavior. A lot of the battle at work is your mental state, and keeping it in a negative space will adversely affect your mood and actions.
8. They Don’t Have to be Your Friends
Your colleagues are just your co-workers, not life-long friends and family. If you find that someone is difficult at work, you can minimize interaction with them to the point where you are only interacting on work-related matters. Don’t go out of your way to avoid them, but don’t make it a point to start conversation or become friends with them.
7. Keep Positive
I’m not asking you to bake cookies or bring donuts in every Monday but try to be a little more positive than you are. Even if you’re already super positive, being more positive never hurt anyone. It may come off as grating and unrealistic, but subconsciously our situation is affected by our mood. Simple actions like smiling and laughing make us have a better day because of endorphins released in our brains. It’s science.
6. Communicate
Difficult people tend to be ignorant of the fact that they’re difficult. However, if someone points it out, they usually get the idea. Instead of bottling something up inside until your head feels like exploding, just say something. Communication is important at work.
5. Put Yourself in Their Shoes
Not enough people do this in today’s world. Understanding someone’s perspective makes you have the ability to communicate with them on a higher level. The person you are dealing with may be difficult, but the reasons behind it could be valid. While it doesn’t work with everyone, some people just need some level of validation before they can be satisfied. Knowing there is someone in their corner is often times enough reason for them to be more agreeable.
4. Hold them Accountable
Difficult people are just as liable to complete what they do at work as those who easy to get along with. If their behavior is interfering with their ability to get work done, you must hold them accountable as much as you would anyone else. By making work results the focus of a discussion, you are not making it personal but showing how the behavior adversely affects business.
3. Go to HR
I hope that it doesn’t get this bad, but if a person’s behavior and personality are so persistently negative that your ability to get work done is affected, it might be time to hit up Human Resources. Most likely you won’t be alone and other coworkers have similar sentiments. Human Resources will talk to the person and take appropriate action.
2. Be Self-Reflective
I know this sounds improbable, but there is a chance that you are the difficult person. If other people are constantly reacting to you in a negative way, there’s a better chance that you’re the source of the negativity, and not the entire earth’s population. It’s hard to swallow, but sometimes changing our own behavior will change the way our interactions go day to day.
1. Do You
The most important thing in dealing with difficult people is that it isn’t affecting your own work. It might be an annoying thing to have to deal with, but remember why you are working at your career in the first place. If you are passionate about what you are doing, never let anyone else take that away. Concentrate on the future, and be sure to continue to work towards your goals.
Difficult people suck, but don’t let them make your life worse. Sadly, if we think about why a person is difficult in the first place, it’s probably because they had to deal with difficult people all their lives and it’s now integrated into their personality. If other people are constantly affecting your mood, you need to reevaluate. Your actions are directly affected by your mood and – over a prolonged period of time – can become who you are. Don’t let difficult people get in the way and change your personality.